“Do What I Say; Not What I Do.”

Over the past year; I have been working on my anger problems extensively. I eventually started facilitating a Women’s Bible Study dealing with the topic of anger. We are working through the book “A Woman’s Answer To Anger” by Annie Chapman.* We have also watched several sermons on DVD (relating to Anger, Pride, Bitterness, etc.) by Dr. S.M. Davis.** Yesterday; we were discussing how much children imitate their parents (and others around them). For instance, if I am yelling at my husband in anger and disrespect, this shows my children that it is okay for them to do that too. The reality is that it is not okay for them or myself. How can I tell them that they can’t be disrespectful or yell at people in anger when they see my example of doing exactly that? The answer is; I can’t. The attitude of “Do what I say; not what I do” is absolutely foolish for parent to have. Children learn visually. If we are doing the opposite of what we say; then we are being hypocritical and turning our children into hypocrites too. As I work through the anger and bitterness that is in my heart; I need to be aware of how I display it in front of my children. Annie Chapman says the following in her book:

“When we- the parents- harbor bitterness and resentment towards others, we are teaching our children to be hurtful and hurt-filled individuals. We cheat them out of one of the basic tools of productive Christian living when we do not offer them the living example of a continual “forgiver.”

A few months ago I posted the following video link on my facebook page. My heart breaks and I cry every time I watch it. Still, it is a visual reminder for me about how the things I do will affect my children.

Children Follow Parents Commercial

(In my opinion; this is not suitable for children to watch.)


My greatest prayer is that I will grow to be a Godly example for my children. I pray that I will never get complacent in my walk towards being more Christlike. I do not want to be the person who leads my children astray because they follow my actions in any area of life.

“This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live by the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin. If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:5-9

*For more on “A Woman’s Answer To Anger” by: Annie Chapman click here. This link will take you to the her revised book with a new title.

**For more about Dr. S.M. Davis’ sermons click here. I highly recommend his sermons to anyone dealing with specific issues. I have learned a lot from him and he backs himself with scripture very well.

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